Saturday, December 15, 2007

The Art of Letting Go

“We often fool ourselves and say, that it’s love only because when it’s gone we end up being lonely. So how are we to know that it is just weren’t so, that we just have to let each other go.”

It’s over. He’s gone! Why do we have to part while the love is still there? Why do we have to suffer? Why do we have to cry when someone bids goodbye? Why does beginning have an end? Why do we have to meet only to lose in the end?

There are questions left unanswered, words left unsaid, letters left unread, poems left undone, songs left unsung, love left unexpressed, promises left unfulfilled.

In relationship, one of the hardest things to do is saying goodbye and letting go. It is hard as breaking a crystal because you’ll never know when you’ll be able to pick up the pieces again. More often than not, they who go, feel not the pain of parting. It is they who stay behind that suffer, because they are left with memories of a love that was meant to be, a love that was.

“There are many times when we share precious moments. But later we realized that they were stolen moments. So how are we to know, that it’s just wasn’t so that we just have to let each other go.”

At the beginning and at the end of the relationship, we are embarrassed to find ourselves alone. Unfair as it may seem, but that’s the way love goes. That’s the drama, the bitter sweet and the risk of falling in love. After all, nothing is constant but change. Everything will eventually come to its end without us knowing when, without us knowing how, without us knowing why. And, we must forget not because we want to but because we have to.

In letting go, sorrows come not as a single spy but in a battalion. It seems that everywhere we go, everything you do, every song you hear, every turn of your head, every move of your body, every beat of your heart, every blink of your eye and every breath you take always reminds you of him. It’s always like a stab of a knife, a torture in the night. Funny how the whole world becomes depopulated when only one person isn’t around. Just imagine there are 7 billion people on earth and yet it seems you feel lonely and empty without the other.

I don’t know if it’s worth calling an art, but letting go entails special skills sparkle with a considerable space and time. Time heals all wounds but it takes a little push on our part. Acceptance plays a part also. Not all wishes come true. Not all love stories end with, “ and they live happily ever after.”

Sometimes we have to part because of circumstances beyond our control. We have to suffer if it would mean happiness for others. We have to cry to temporarily let go of the pain. Every beginning has its end like every dawn has its dusk. It’s something we can’t control, something we have to live up.

It’s over. He’s gone. But life has to go on. Goodbye doesn’t mean forever. There will always be a place and time when questions will be answered, words will be spoken, letters will be read, poems will be recited in the night, songs will be sung in harmony, love will be expressed in solitude and promises will be fulfilled. Somewhere. Somehow. Someday.

“If loving you is all that means to me. And being happy is all I hope you’ll be. If loving you must mean I really have to set you free. [Then let it be]”

Monday, November 26, 2007

The Secret of Unhappiness

  1. The secret of the "I Want"
  2. Focusing on evil
  3. Make demands of yourself
  4. I need many things
  5. Live in resentment
  6. The secret of self-pity
  7. The path of envy
  8. Expect high

by Fr. Moga, SJ

Thursday, November 15, 2007

From Gab

“Nobody deserves your tears, but whoever deserves them will not make you cry.”
--Gabriel Garcia Marquez

"If I knew that today would be the last time I’d see you, I would hug you tight and pray the Lord be the keeper of your soul. If I knew that this would be the last time you pass through this door, I’d embrace you, kiss you, and call you back for one more. If I knew that this would be the last time I would hear your voice, I’d take hold of each word to be able to hear it over and over again. If I knew this is the last time I see you, I’d tell you I love you, and would not just assume foolishly you know it already."
--Gabriel Garcia Marquez

"He is ugly and sad...but he is all love" --Gabriel Garcia Marquez

Poem Excerpts from Millay

Lament

Life must go on,
And the dead be forgotten;
Life must go on,
Though good men die;(...)
Life must go on;
I forget just why.

XLVII by Edna Vincent Millay

Well, I have lost you and I lost you fairly;
In my own way, and with my full consent,
Say what you will kings in a tumbril rarely
Went to their deaths more proud than this one went.
Some night of apprehension and hot weeping
I will confess; but that's permitted me:
Day dried my eyes; I was not one for keeping
Rubbed in a cage a wing that would be free.
If I have loved you less or played you slyly
I might have held you for a summer more,
But at the cost of words I value highly,
And no such summer as the one before.
Should I outlive this anguish--and men do--
I shall have only one good to say of you.

Sunday, November 4, 2007

From Flora

  • “Sometimes we put to much passion on the biggest dreams and priorities in life that we fail to love the smallest pleasures from simple things. We search so much for the right choices, for the right paths to walk through, for the right time and the for the right reasons. But life isn’t all about searching for the things that can be found. It is about letting the unexpected happen and finding things you never searched for.”
  • The longer one observes the rhythms of life, the more one notices that certain days are simply more important than others. One day is filled with portent, while the next is practically void of significance. Such is the relative nature of days."

Thursday, November 1, 2007

Enemy Within

Of the seven deadly sins, anger is possibly the most fun. To taste your own wounds, to smack your lips with grievances, to roll over your tongue the prospect of bitter confrontations still to come, to taste both the pain you are given and the pain you are giving back. The main drawback is that what you are putting down is yourself, the main course at the feast is you, and the loser is you.

Anger is the most impotent of passions. It effects nothing it goes about, and hurts the one who is possessed by it more than the one against whom it is directed. Anger does not improve yourself, but it helps you hurt or step on someone. You cannot make others as you wish them to be, since you cannot make yourself as you wish to be.

A man makes inferiors his superiors by heat, self control is the rule and solution. Anger is an uncontrollable feeling that betrays yourself, it is also the powerful force that blows out the light of reason. Know this to be the enemy within: ANGER, born in desire.

ANONYMOUS

Monday, October 29, 2007

My Students' Insights

After my discussion of the poem entitled, "The Old Man, His Son and Their Bike" they've come up with these insights:
  • Do not make accusations without knowing the real situation. --AC, Tasha
  • Be confident in your decision, for being influenced leads to your own destruction.--Alex, Firmo
  • Satisfying others to satisfy yourself won't be very satisfactory. --Joanna, Jasmine
  • Before you satisfy other's thirst, satisfy yourself first.--Jhanine, Faye
  • Don't believe in what other's say but believe in your initiative.--Marlon
  • Don't let others pull your strings like a puppet.--Jimmy, Martie
  • If you pretend to be someone else sooner or later that's who you become.--Kym

Friday, October 12, 2007

Sadness

"for all sad words of tongue and pen, the saddest are these.. "it might have been......"

john greenleaf whittier

"them most gladsome thing in the world is that we seldom fall low, the saddest that , with such capabilities , we seldom rise high..."

james mathew barrie

"the saddest thing in the world, is loving someone who used to love you"

Anonymous

"Don't fear failure so much that you refuse to try new things. The saddest summary of a life contains three descriptions: could have, might have, and should have. "

Louis E. Boone

'Our sweetest songs are those that tell of saddest thought.'

Percy Bysshe Shelley

At This Very Minute...

  • someone is thinking of you
  • someone cares about you.
  • someone misses you
  • someone wants to hold your hand.
  • someone wants you to be happy.
  • someone wants to hug you.
  • someone will do anything for you.
  • someone needs to know your love is unconditional.
  • someone wants to tell you how much they care.
  • someone wants to stay up watching movies w/ you.
  • someone wants to hold you in their arms.
  • someone wants to see you.
  • someone wants to be your lover.
  • someone loves you for who you are.
  • someone loves the way you make them feel.
  • someone wants to be with you.
  • someone wants you to know they are there for you.
  • someone is glad that you're their friend.
  • someone is wishing you would notice them.
  • someone wants to get to know you better.
  • someone loves you.

Keep It Real

BOY: I saw her today
GIRL: I saw him today

BOY: It seems like its been forever
GIRL: I wonder if he still cares

BOY: She looks better than before
GIRL: I couldn't stop staring at him

BOY: I asked her how things were going
GIRL: I asked about his new girlfriend

BOY: I'd choose her over any girl im with
GIRL: He's probablly really happy right now

BOY: I couldnt look at her without starting to cry
GIRL: He couldnt even look at me

BOY: I told her I miss her
GIRL: He doesnt mean it

BOY: I meant it
GIRL: He didnt mean it

BOY: I love her
GIRL: He loves his new girlfriend

BOY: I held her for the last time
GIRL: He gave me a friendly hug

BOY: Then I went home and cried
GIRL: Then I went home and cried

BOY: I lost her
GIRL: I still love him

The Tao of Pooh

Who’s Talking? Pooh is.

  • Pooh: “We might find something that we weren’t looking for, which might be just what were looking for, really,”
  • “When you wake up in the morning, Pooh,” said Piglet at last, “what’s the first thing you say to yourself?” “What’s for breakfast?” said Pooh. “What do you say, Piglet?”“I say, I wonder what’s going to happen exciting today?” said Piglet. Pooh nodded thoughtfully.It’s the same thing,” he said.
  • “Rabbit’s clever,” said Pooh thoughtfully. “Yes,” said Piglet, “Rabbit’s clever.” “And he has Brain.” “Yes,” said Piglet, “Rabbit has Brain.” There was a long silence.“I suppose,” said Pooh, “That that’s why he never understands anything.”
  • …you can’t help respecting anybody who can spell TUESDAY, even if he doesn’t spell it right; but spelling isn’t everything. There are days when spelling Tuesday simply doesn’t count.
  • “What do you like doing best in the world, Pooh?” “Well,” said Pooh, “what I like best – “ and then he had to stop and think. Because although Eating Honey was a very good thing to do, there was a moment just before you began to eat it which was better than when you were, but he didn’t know what it was called.

Song:
How can you get very far,
If you don’t know Who You Are?
How can you do what you ought,
If you don’t know What You’ve Got?
And if you don’t know Which To Do
Of all the things in front of you,
Then what you’ll have when you are through
Is just a mess without a clue
Of all the best that can come true
If you know What and Which and Who.


Benjamin’s chat

  • Hopefully your knowledge doesn’t fall under any of these:Rabbit – Knowledge for the sake of Being Clever; Owl – Knowledge for the sake of Appearing Wise; Eeyore – Knowledge for the sake of Complaining About Something.
  • Sourness and bitterness come from the interfering and unappreciative mind. Life itself, when understood and utilized for what it is, is sweet.
  • There is Something More, and that Something More is what life is really all about.
  • Knowledge and Experience do not necessarily speak the same language.
  • There is more to knowing than just being correct.
  • The thing that makes someone truly different—unique, in fact—is something that cleverness cannot really understand.
  • Things are as They Are: We make things into something else and do not use it in its proper way.
  • “One disease, long life. No disease, short life.” In other words, those who know what’s wrong with them and take care of themselves accordingly will tend to live a lot longer than those who consider themselves perfectly healthy and neglect their weaknesses. So in that sense at least, a Weakness of some sort can do you a big favor, if you acknowledge that it’s there.
  • Things just happen in the right way, at the right time. At least they do when you let them, when you work with circumstances instead of saying, “This isn’t supposed to be happening this way,” and trying hard to make it happen some other way. If you’re in tune with The Way Things Work, then they work the way they need to, no matter what you may think about it at the time. Later on, you can look back and say, “Oh now I understand. That had to happen so that those could happen, and those had to happen in order for this to happen…” Then you realize that even if you tried to make it all turn out perfectly, you couldn’t have done better, and if you’d really tried, you would have made a mess of the whole thing.
  • There was a man who disliked seeing his footprints and his shadow. He decided to escape from them and began to run. But as he ran along, more footprints appeared, while his shadow easily kept up with him. Thinking he was going too slowly, he ran faster and faster without stopping, until he finally collapsed from exhaustion and died. (If he had stood still, there would have been no footprints. If he had rested in the shade, his shadow would have disappeared.)
  • Practically speaking, if time saving devices really saved time, there would be more time available to us now than ever before in history. But strangely enough, we seem to have less time than even a few years ago. It’s really great fun to go somewhere where there are no timesaving devices because, when you do, you find that you have lots of time. Elsewhere, you’re too busy working to pay for machines to save you time so you won’t have to work so hard. The main problem with this great obsession for saving time is very simple: you can’t save time. You can only spend it. But you can spend it wisely or foolishly.
  • The Christmas presents once opened are Not So Much Fun as they were while we were in the process of examining, lifting, shaking, thinking about and opening them. Each time the goal is reached, it becomes Not So Much Fun, and we’re off to reach the next one. That doesn’t mean that the goals we have don’t count. They do, mostly because they cause us to go through the process, and it’s the process that makes us wise, happy, or whatever. If we do things in the wrong sort of way, it makes us miserable, angry, confused and things like that. The goal has to be right for us, and it has to be beneficial, in order to ensure a beneficial process. But aside from that, it’s really the process that’s important. Enjoyment of the process is the secret that erases the myths of Great Reward and Saving Time. By enjoying the process, we can stretch that awareness out so that it’s no longer only a moment, but covers the whole thing.
  • “From caring comes courage.” We might add that from it also comes wisdom. It’s rather significant, we think, that those who have no compassion have no wisdom. Knowledge, yes; cleverness, maybe; wisdom, no. A clever mind is not a heart. Knowledge doesn’t really care. Wisdom does.
  • An Empty sort of mind is valuable for finding things because it can see what’s in front of it. An Overstuffed mind is unable to. While the Clear mind listens to a bird singing, the Stuffed-Full-of-Knowledge-and-Cleverness mind wonders what kind of bird is singing. The more Stuffed Up it is, the less it can hear through its own ears and see through its own eyes. Knowledge and Cleverness tend to concern themselves with the wrong sorts of things, and a mind confused by Knowledge, Cleverness and Abstract Ideas tend to go chasing off after things that don’t matter, or that don’t exist, instead of seeing, appreciating and making use of what is right in front of it.
  • Many people are afraid of Emptiness, however, because it reminds them of Loneliness. Everything has to be filled in, it seems – appointment books, hillsides, vacant lots – but when all the spaces are filled, the Loneliness really begins. Then the Groups are joined, the Classes a re signed up for, and the Gift-To-Yourself items are bought. When the Loneliness starts creeping in the door, the Television Set is turned on to make it go away. But it doesn’t go away. So some of us do instead, and after discarding the emptiness of the Big Congested Mess, we discover the fullness of Nothing.

Monday, October 8, 2007

A Thought from Homer

How people wish they'd be treated with sincerity and be offered with clean intentions--free from prejudices and biases which each person possesses.

Saturday, September 29, 2007

By Paolo Coelho

“I think that perhaps we always fall in love the very first time we see the man of our dreams, even though, at the time, reason may be telling otherwise, and we may fight against that instinct, hoping against hope that we won't win, until there comes a point when we allow ourselves to be vanquished by our feelings...”—Paolo Coelho

“Waiting is painful. Forgetting is painful. But not knowing which to do is the worse kind of suffering.”--Paolo Coelho

“One is loved because one is loved. No reason is needed for loving.”—Paolo Coelho

“You can become blind by seeing each day as a similar one. Each day is a different one, each day brings a miracle of its own. It's just a matter of paying attention to this miracle.”—Paolo Coelho

“But there is suffering in life, and there are defeats. No one can avoid them. But it's better to lose some of the battles in the struggles for your dreams than to be defeated without ever knowing what you're fighting for.”—Paolo Coelho

There is only one thing that makes a dream impossible to achieve: the fear of failure.—Paolo Coelho

You will see that, in order to do the important things in life, at times one must allow oneself to do nothing.—Paolo Coelho

A child can always teach an adult three things: to be happy for no reason, to always be busy with something, and to know how to demand with all his might that which he desires.—Paolo Coelho

By Kahlil Gibran

And ever has it been known that love knows not its own depth until the hour of separation. –Kahlil Gibran

Exaggeration is truth that has lost its temper. –Kahlil Gibran

Friendship is always a sweet responsibility, never an opportunity. –Kahlil Gibran

I have learned silence from the talkative, toleration from the intolerant, and kindness from the unkind; yet, strange, I am ungrateful to those teachers.—Kahlil Gibran

If you love somebody, let them go, for if they return, they were always yours. And if they don't, they never were. —Kahlil Gibran

The obvious is that which is never seen until someone expresses it simply.—Kahlil Gibran

Friday, September 21, 2007

The Dilemma

To laugh is to risk appearing a fool
To weep is to risk appearing sentimental
To reach out to another is to risk involvement
To expose feelings is to risk rejection
To place dreams before the crowd is to risk ridicule.
To love is to risk not being loved in return
To go forward in the face of overwhelming odds is to risk failure
But risks must be taken because the greatest hazard in life is to risk nothing.
The person who risks nothing does nothing, has nothing and is nothing.
He may avoid suffering or sorrow, but he cannot learn, feel, change, grow or love.
Chained by his certitudes he is a slave.
He has forfeited his freedom.
Only a person who takes risks is free.

Anonymous

Sunday, September 16, 2007

A Film Punch

I happen to browse my friend's cellular phone and incidentally found these lines from the films he watched. Too bad, I wasn't able to see all these movies, but indeed they gave me a good punch right after each line read. :D

  • "Love has given me wings, so I must fly" - A Knight's Tale
  • "You make me want to be a better man" - Anastasia
  • "It's the scariest day of the year. Yet only one thing scares me, that we might never have met." - Autumn in New York
  • "You are what I never knew I always wanted." - Fools Rush In
  • "Will you love me for the rest of your life? "No, I'll love you for the rest of mine." - Phenomenon
  • "Don't say we aren't right for each other, the way I see it is, we aren't right for anyone else." - The Cutting Edge
  • "When you realize you want to spend the rest of your life with somebody, you want the rest of your life to start as soon as possible." - When Harry Met Sally

Saturday, August 18, 2007

Hit by Words

  • "So then we turn to lying hoping that we can lie to ourselves"
  • "It's better to cross the line and suffer the consequences than to just stare at the line for the rest of your life.

Friday, July 27, 2007

My Haikus

a meek fur in cave
its echoes, catching z's all around,
then, a petal moves

orange leaves
fell from a tree
caressing my palms...

a fiery ball
between two bulky hills
targets paleness of cheeks

a color holding on to a petal
the invisible strands blew hard
lost...

green spines
from still dense branches
housing fur inside

small bean
thrown on soil--
a tree...

raise, O, broken saucer
strands of wind slap your rays
all are hiding

heart shaped frames
on trees they hover
humming silence

brown hands
humming along by its body curves--
it sang

sword thrust green frames,
worms bodies are nourished
in dark, back to stillness

white snow sheet
covers the compact soil
deep down, shaking bodies

shivering bones
alone under resting twigs
shadows from heavenly craters

eyelashes worshipped the glare
reflected the color of the leaves
as droplets of ice fall

with the strands of branches
rattle with the twigs
forming graceful steps

as a catterpillar in a cocoon
clothed with anticipation
it's opening, a blast of colors

rays penetrate
sweat drifts the erected popsicles
over the field

ground yields smoke
drops rolled
under leaf, a frog shivers

Saturday, July 21, 2007

Cartography

People are blindfolded cartographers of life.

Suffer

All my life, I've learned to suffer in silence...

Source: Witch of Portobello by Paolo Coelho

Reflection:
Let me say it, "All my life, I've learned to suffer in silence" . This has been the only way I knew best to keep friendships, relationships and acquaintances. Every time I am at rage, I keep it deep down my recesses of emotional seas... It created typhoons within, huriccanes of mixed emotions. It lambasted the serenity of my undisturbed waters. Although this turbulence shakes my identity, virtues rose from the blue waters of my melancholy. After the adversities I was beset, calmness settles in--the sun is once again visible, animals in hibernation went out their hide-outs, celebrating the beauty of nature's placidity. At the end of the day, I am still seeing my friends' delightful countenance, they still call me by name and I kept my bonds of my personal lines of events.

Defiance

Keeping one's virginity is a rightful defiance.

Sunday, July 1, 2007

To Look For

"We might find something that we weren't looking for which might be just we were looking for, really..."

Source: Tao of Pooh by Benjamin Hoff

Saturday, May 19, 2007

Late

Before he was there,now, he is nowhere
I pretended, I never intended
To find the trust which ended as rust
I was his only that time can never beat it badly
But that was my thought, he surrendered as i fought
He struggled while I was boggled
By his enthusiasm which I doubted as sarcasm
For him all is true, my mind and heart construe
Just then time watered the fire, I was to play his lyre
As I strummed, i saw no ear and found my fear
All was gone when I decided to be his one
Now, am alone in a monotone
These I saw, and made up as a law
Time lessens intensity, those feelings of less density
Time can test, it chooses what's best
He was less I confirmed my guess
The rest attests, he loved lest

Monday, May 14, 2007

Alaala

Alaala,
Ikay handog ni Bathala, Nilalathala
Ng kahapong mga gantimpala

Alaala,
Bigla, bigla; ngiti ay pinipiga
upang lumitaw ang saya at laya

Out By Lead

rriFrom a simple bloodstain to a massive bloodshed
From chatting butterflies to roaring eagles
From a sprouting bud to wildest of forests
From smokey outburts to a nebula blast
These,
Within the hardworking organ
A shouting silence
Once whispered by madness
It started to burn the residue
Of unspoken libretto
It boiled the red fluid which ran through and tinted
the violet dead channels
as it embraces the slender grasping bones
cuddling the thin cylindrical wood
Whooosh..
from the black tip of its opening apex...
Out it goes. Out!

Hunghong ug Mulo

Wa gayod maskin dukot,
maskin lawog
sa lubot sa hungot.
Nagkagod apan
wa maskin tansan.
Kay sa kalisod,
Ang kapid-ang tawo nagsaguyod
wa pa kapabulad
sa ilang mga mulo
ngadto sa dako-dako
nga gialirongan
og gipatalinghogan
sa mga manuplaay
nga nagdako
sa kahamugaway.
Sa may kinadak-ang pako,
sila nagapanghunghong,
nagapatubo
sa gahom, namasak
sa ekonomiyang lusak.
Ug tungod sa ilang kabungol,
nangaslom na
ang hiyos
nga mga tungol.

Iti

Nigula
gikan sa lubot
sa mayang nagpalami
sa bayabas nga hinog.
Nahagbong
Itom, nagtikoskos
daw siling kuyos
apan sa sulod
may lisong
nangandoy
sa sidlak
sa adlaw.

Friday, May 11, 2007

In Amity

In love, people should be claustrophobic. Their feeling of collective attraction to be with and for others is basically lain on the ashes of those who long for and are in selfish commitments and shallow engangements. Struggle is to exclusively commit oneself as it refuses to detach from amity. Here lies growth. Somewhere else? qualms coat souls . Hhhmmmmm... and so, ending up as the individuals that they are, they wanted no more, no less. Although desolation visits their reveries, they remain tough against goodbyes.

The facticity that people do come and go is what everybody inherently walks through. Significant others leave...in their time and in their ways. Those left are hurt by ways they made up themselves and by which they are healed. People was never cheated. He cheats himself. Everytime individuals give themselves, they gain themselves twice. No loss, none at all. Generosity is a selfish act. :) uhhhh... paradox? oxymoron? or irony? -- a personification of virtue...:)